Day 31.

One BIG observation:

I realized something big today. As so many of my friends enter their senior year and as I begin filling out scholarships once again, I've been reminded more and more about my high school experience: the grades, the speeches, the awards. So much of who I am in Anacortes is defined by the number of times I've appeared in the newspaper. Here, I'm not producing things that are seen by an entire student body. I'm not playing in front of bleacher-fuls of loyal fans. No one knows about the trophies, the announcements, the film festivals...and you know what? They don't care.

In my computer class I give the girls some free time to write letters to family and friends (printing things makes them very excited). Usually they leave the name of the receiver for last because so often the letters are directed towards secret crushes. One girl was working diligently on a letter for the past week; I assumed it was to one of her boy interests. It wasn't. It was to me.

The people I encounter her (the other missionaries, my host family, the girls I work with) are all seeing the real Hannah -- the one who still struggles with Spanish, the one who spends too much time on facebook, the one who loses her patience. And they still love me. My greatest fear about graduating high school was that all my respect, all my friendships, that all happiness I had gained over the last four years would be locked away with my medals and headlines and plaques. The truth is that people don't need to know about any of those things -- they still want to be close to me.

I can't explain how peaceful that makes me feel.